Thursday, November 30, 2006

The Next Great Prime Minister

Sounds like a reality TV show to pick Canada's next Prime Minister, doesn't it? Well that's cause it is, sort of. This coming March, four former Canadian Prime Minsters will serve as judges on this show to pick the most able would-be leader of Canada.

So one has to wonder if there will be a pirouette competition... behind a queen perhaps...

(I love how I read about this on a British news site, by the way)

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Round up them Muslims!

Ok so I'd like to start by apologizing to the three of you who read this blog. I had to take a little time off to attend to some scholarly matters, and I'm sorry if you've been checking this page feverishly several times a day to see what quirky insight I would have into current affairs, only to be disappointed over and over again.

But this one's good, if you haven't heard it already. A couple of days ago, as a joke/social experiment talk show host Jerry Klein started his show by suggesting that all Muslims be forced to wear "idenifying markers". He said: "I"m thinking either it should be an arm band, a crescent moon arm band, or it should be a crescent moon tattoo." (4:00).

Here are a couple of the responses he got:

"Not only do you tattoo them in the middle of their foreheads; you round them up and then ship them out of this country, period." (15:58)

"I don't think you go far enough... you have to set up encampments like they did during World War II like with the Japanese and Germans." (23.50)

It's actually worth scrolling to the bottom of this page to listen to the whole thing, especially the end when he blasts them for buying into it.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Proud to be Persian

Iran is finally making progress in policy matters. Thanks to Ahmadinejad's cracking down on Iran's wanton publishing industry, the country's youth will be spared from the consequences of the previous president's "cultural indulgence" and "relaxed attitude". As we all know, culture has been clearly demonstrated to encourage immoral behaviour and sex before marriage. Allah only knows what would have happened if Mahmoud hadn't stepped in when he did - we might have ended up with another Pakistan on our hands.

A royal victory!

Ok so I'm sorry for the headline. I tried to avoid one of those, I really did, but I couldn't help it. Anyway, so France is on the way to having its first female president! And she's a socialist! And she don't look to bad in a bikini for a 53 year old, do she?!

So to answer those pertinent political questions/comments from her competitors for leadership of the socialist party - ie: "who will take care of the children?" and "she'd be better off staying at home" - "someone else" and "f--k you"!

Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Pakistan turns into a "free sex zone"!

That's right, ladies and gents. Interested in a little carefree sex in a laid-back atmosphere? Look no further than the glorious state of Pakistan.

A recent vote by Pakistan's national assembly has decided that rape cases will no longer be tried under Shari'a law, where women must provide four male witnesses to prove their case, and punishments for being a rape victim include lashing or stoning. Instead, such cases will be tried in a normal court, under civil law, where perpetrators might actually be convicted of rape. In a country where a woman is raped every two hours, and one is gang-raped every eight, religious critics are absolutely right in claiming that this bill will encourage "free sex" - for once women will be able to freely decide when they want to have sex, and when they don't.

So keep it in your pants, boys.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Toodle-oo Rumsfeld

I think I believe in America again...?

Well it looks like we're gonna be seeing fewer of these in South Dakota, thanks to yesterday's elections. SD's government tried to slip a sweeping abortion ban through last year, but thankfully protests forced them to let the people decide. The ban would have banned abortion in all cases, including rape, unless the mother's wife was at stake (well clearly it should be illegal in rape cases - I bet those floozy South Dakotans have been prancing around without their hijabs on, asking for it).

Also, Democrats take the House, cross your fingers for the Senate, and it looks like Armani-clad lady Democrat Nancy Pelosi will be the FIRST female Speaker of the House! That's two steps away from President, folks. Think she can get close enough to give him a swift kick in the nuts?

Tuesday, November 07, 2006

Iran's Paris Hilton... and Pamela Anderson, and Britney Spears, and...

A rising young soap star in Iran faces a lashing from the Iranian government as punishment for having sex outside of marriage. Her indiscretion was brought to the attention of the Islamic moral police (yes, the same guys who came close to arresting yours truly just one year ago), when a video of her sexual encounter was widely distributed to the public by an unknown source (probably the lover). The video was apparently taken with her consent.

Interesting how this would ruin a girl's career in Iran, when it would start hers here.

And also, lashing?! Only if those Mullahs put on some high heels and a garter belt and make it interesting.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

The bad guys get what's comin' to 'em!

So let's see... Saddam Hussein has finally been sentenced to death by hanging, and an influential U.S. military newspaper calls for Donald Rumsfeld's resignation! Out with evil military dictators and... evil military dictators!

Friday, November 03, 2006

Haggard the Homo

This is actually too good to be true. Evangelist Rev. Ted Haggard, the US' loudest opponent to same-sex rights, who calls homosexuality a mortal sin on a regular basis, who advises George dubya on spiritual issues on a weekly basis... is a closet fag! And a methamphetamine user!! How did we not see this earlier? Funny how it's always those who most adamantly oppose homosexuality who end up practicing the opposite of what they preach. At least this time it wasn't a Catholic priest - that was getting a little redundant.

And now, also in this week's news, another right-wing middle aged man who can't seem to let the same-sex marriage issue go... is there something Stephen Harper isn't telling us?

Thursday, November 02, 2006

Future Husband of the Week: Barack Obama

This Illinois Senator has to become president of the United States. Then he has to ditch the wife and two kids so that we can live happily ever after, benevolently leading the people to freedom.

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Dead woman painting

20 year old Delara Dalabi confessed to a murder she says she didn't commit three years ago because her lover - who committed the crime - convinced her that since Iranian law prohibits the execution of minors, as a 17 year old she would face minimum penalty. As it turns out, the Iranian government (surprise, surprise) broke their own laws and decided to execute her anyway. Tehran's Golestan gallery is hosting an exhibition of her works, almost all of which have been produced during her incarceration, to help her fight for her life. Regardless of her fate, these haunting images will live on to tell a story that is unfortunately all too familiar to us now...

Better stock up, kids!

Colombia's biggest druglord, Orlando Sabogal Zuluaga has just been arrested in Spain. Zuluaga runs a drug cartel that supplies up to half of the world's cocaine.

I have only one question: WHAT WILL THE FASHIONISTAS DO?